I have lived as a celiac for a long time now. Usually it does not phase me. I have truly been blessed. My familyand friends have embraced feeding me. They have learned to check ingredients, create ‘Heather friendly’ menus for family dinner, allow me to check the ingredients on things that they have used in their cooking and most importantly, they do not get insulted if I just don’t eat something. I love them all for helping to normalise me in the outside world. Â
I have navigated re-learning to bake. In the process I also learned that I was no longer capable of making my famous pastry. This process began as very frustrating and turned into a more academic pursuit especially once I began to encounter baking with food allergies. Along the way I had many, many failures and some resounding success.
After my diagnosis I rarely went out to eat. I was sure that they were going to kill me with food. With time, we ventured out more. I think that surviving our first adoption trip to China went along way to help. I mean, if I could eat there without dying (granted I ate mostly rice) then I should be able to eat here at home. I am always excited when we find another restaurant with gluten free options. Most of the time if a restaurant has gluten free options they are aware of making “safe” meals. Then other times you are lulled into a false sense of security. They can answer your questions and you think that they Get It but they don’t.Â
 This past weekend this point was brought home to me. I was out for dinner with friends enjoyed a lovely gluten free cesar salad and got halfway through a bowl of rice pasta when there it was – a wheat noodle. Carelessness in the kitchen. An uncleaned strainer or frying pan caused by a rush? A new cook who just didn’t get it yet? A server who had not properly conveyed who the chef was cooking for? The manager was beside himself with concern but once the gluten has been eaten there is not much that can be done. Does the free meal help me feel better as I am curled up in pain? Will it give me back energy the next day to play with my kids? Unfortunately no but I can appreciate the gesture. It will also not help me to ever eat at your restaurant again. That said, I refuse to go back to those early days where I ate only a baked potatoe and had my drink. I simply will not.
I will not let this beat me. I will continue to force myself to push the boundaries. Try new recipes at home, hang out with friends, travel. This all involves risk but without risk there is no growth. In that I will be showing my girls resiliency and strength; something that they will need as they grow.